The legend of Amobi Okoye
If you haven't already heard, Amobi Okoye is 19. That's right, he's 19. If you haven't turned on ESPN or read a newspaper or gone online or opened your eyes, Amobi Okoye is 19 years old.
While Amobi awaits his fate in the upcoming NFL draft and others continue to "marvel" over the fact he's just 19 years old, we did zero research to take a look at some of his interesting feats as he sped through childhood like an altered beast.
AGE/ ACCOMPLISHMENT
- 5 - taught his teacher how to read
- 7 - beat Aquaman in a fish-talking contest
- 8 - arm wrestled a grizzly bear
- 9 - cooked flapjacks for his entire class on a bunson burner
- 11 - grew a beard, which grew arms, that subsequently bench-pressed 3 live alligators
- 11.5 - took Michelle Sway, the prettiest high school senior, to the prom. That night he won Prom King and boned her and her twin cousin under the bleachers
- 12 - started for his high school varsity football
- 13 - leg-pressed a car
- 13.5 - shotgunned a keg of Fosters
- 14 - ran a marathon backwards
- 14.25 - ate 9 Saltines in one minute
- 15 - extinguished the Marlboro Man's cigarette without confrontation
- 16 - defeated The Hart Foundation at SummerSlam
- 17 - shit on Mt. Everest
