Oden, Durant to debut ESPN nostril cam at Draft

Oden seen here during the bumpy testing phase of the nose cam.

(NEW YORK, NY) -- Although hard to find anywhere on ESPN or its site, the Worldwide Leader signed an 8-year extension with the NBA yesterday, perfectly timing the magnificent news with tonight's NBA Draft.  To celebrate, they also announced it would debut its latest gimmick tonight: "The Nostril Cam."

Special cameras fastened with an unecesarry microphone will be placed in the nostrils of Greg Oden and Kevin Durant to give the viewer a first-hand perspective never seen before on draft night.

"What better way to view the draft than from a player's nostril?" said network ballbag Bernie Happendorf.  "The players don't wear helmets, so we had to think about this real hard.  We chose the nostril because for the most part it's always stationary.  So now the viewer will get the constant, ridiculous bird's eye view during the handsake... as well as the occasional booger."

Oden and Durant were initially hesistant to go along with the idea, but were quickly shown a compliance document they had signed showing their allegience to ESPN and Satan.

"We feel this will beat out the under-the-basket, up-the-shorts camera view that TNT has been using," Happendorf continued.  "The hope is to make this the most uncomfortable camera angle ever."

ESPN also reportedly toyed with the Stu Scott lazy eye cam to use between picks, but decided against it in fear it would make the viewer dizzy in addition to the already overwhelming feeling of nausea.