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The Sports Hernia

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Wednesday, December 19, 2007

The many faces of one Skip Bayless

Skip_bayless_gives_panel_silent_t_3
Skip Bayless starts off with his predictably catty 'I will not look at you,
I will not speak to you' silent treatment.

Skip_bayless_points_at_liar
Bayless quickly points out what a liar everyone is, and that his face is actually only 3/4 rubber.

Skip_bayless_kung_fu_or_arm_wrestle
Pretending he simply wants to do some 12 oz. curls, Bayless moves in for the kill with his signature 'Kung Fu the crap out of you' arm chop.

Skip_bayless_i_will_murder_you
Clearly not pleased with the amount of fear he's instilled, Bayless locks into his patented 'I will murder the crap out of you' doom face.

Skip_bayless_projectile_vomit
With the anger inside him blatantly consuming his belly, Bayless vomits up ten miniature's Skip aliens who proceed to mess up all of his crappy notes.

Skip_bayless_threatens_to_crush_hea
Upset and embarrassed, Bayless crushes an invisible head of his own likeness.

Skip_bayless_kiss_and_make_up
After being calmed (read: sedated) by producers, Skip works up a creepy
'kiss & make-up' peace offering.

Skip_bayless_baby_talk
As the meds take control, the inevitable 'Bayless baby talk' runs rampant.

Skip_bayless_billy_idol_impression
After realizing there is simply no god, producers begin chewing on electrical cords while Bayless rocks a surprisingly dead-on Billy Idol impression.

Skip_bayless_turning_into_the_hulk
Bayless suddenly begins to Hulk up after a renegade production assistant plunges him in the ass with a steroid syringe.

Skip_bayless_stunned_reaction_2
Hulked up Bayless deftly thwarts off sure death by catching a grenade in his mouth and quickly firing it out of his ass like a space rocket.

Skip_bayless_you_knew
Bayless, now back on his game and clearly focused, begins his spastic finger pointing routine before sprouting wings and abruptly flying off the set.

Howard_bryant_fears_bayless
After the remaining living producers successfully talk Bayless back to the set, Howard Bryant, now a shell of himself, confesses, "I fear Skip Bayless."

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