Synerfied Healthcare announced on Wednesday that it signed Pau Gasol as a spokesman for Nodoro, the company's anti-ballstank cream. Gasol joins the esteemed Team Nodoro, which already includes John Runyan, A.J. Hawk, Jumbo Elliot, Serena Williams and the entire WWE.
Here's an excerpt from Gasol's press release:
"I'm very happy to announce my new partnership with Nodoro. I've already had a chance to sit down and talk with both A.J. and Serena, and they showed me how wonderful their rejuvenated balls smell now. With Nodoro, I can now party outside of Spain and France without being afraid to set my formerly gangus sack free into the open air. I'll no longer need to worry about NBA groupies fainting down there either, and that uncomfortable explanation when I bring them to the hospital. Plus, my tailor won't have to wear that gas mask anymore. This product gives me the confidence my boys down below were looking for. I'm proud to announce I'm part of Team Nodoro and say, 'I smell perfect!'"
As the company's about page states, if you've ever asked yourself the following, you too probably need Nodoro:
"Why is it that no matter how much time and effort I put into washing my penis in the shower, I still get that awful whiff of a rancid smell throughout the day, or even right after a shower?"
Because let's be honest, we all want to feel as free as this guy.