This thing vacationing on Nick Swisher's chin...

... is on a chemical overdose
... hated it when Hogan painted his beard black
... attended Ridgemont High
... thinks Billy Koch sucks
... is a tribute to elaborate landing strips
... will one day live on Scott Spiezio's face
... was formerly attached to Rikishi
... once berated Peter Vecsey's beard shavings
... ate the caterpillar on Brandon Inge's lower lip
... is high as hell
... gets laid more than you do
... will eventually strong-arm neighboring sideburns into bleaching themselves