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Thursday, May 29, 2008

Addition of MLB player names expected to wreak havoc at National Spelling Bee

Scripps_national_spelling_bee_3

The 2008 Scripps National Spelling Bee won't be without a twist this afternoon as a late wrinkle to the rules will have the accomplished young spellers preparing to rattle off some of the elaborate last names of today's professional baseball players.

Dozens of little Indian children, some of whom didn't even know what baseball was until last week, were seen scouring over Topps cards in the lobby of the event sponsored hotel earlier this morning.

With the new addendum to the rules, a dark horse has emerged in 13-year old focused powerhouse Jerry Brewster (pictured above), who was seen practicing spelling and sentence use with his father, while chest bumping each other and screaming "Let's go Brew!" after each correctly spelled name:

"Teixeira.  Teixeira will likely be a Yankee next year.  T-e-i-x-e-i-r-a.  Teixeira."

"Mientkiewicz.  Mientkiewicz will likely be in the minors soon.  M-i-e-n-t-k-i-e-w-i-c-z.  Mientkiewicz."

"Saltalamacchia.  Saltalamacchia was in the minors but now he's back!  S-a-l-t-a-l-a-m-a-c-c-h-i-a.  Saltalamacchia."

"Grudzielanek.  Grudzielanek posed for a weird calendar that gives me nightmares.  G-r-u-d-z-i-e-l-a-n-e-k.  Grudzielanek."

"Podsednik.  Podsednik hasn't been the same since he beat Jeter out for the last All-Star spot.  P-o-d-s-e-d-n-i-k.  Podsednik."

"Quintanilla.  Quintanilla took a ground ball in the nuts at second base last night.  Q-u-i-n-t-a-n-i-l-l-a.  Quintanilla."

"Isringhausen.  Isringhausen will be shot-putting the ball by seasons end because LaRussa overuses his bullpen.  I-s-r-i-n-g-h-a-u-s-e-n.  Isringhausen."

"Van Benschoten.  Van Benschoten is a pitcher for some team in Pittsburgh.  V-a-n B-e-n-s-c-h-o-t-e-n.  Van Benschoten."

"Catalanotto.  Catalanotto is ginny for baseball player.  C-a-t-a-l-a-n-o-t-t-o.  Catalanotto."

"Fukudome.  I wish mom would let me say Fukudome more often.  F-u-k-u-d-o-m-e.  Fukudome."

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