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The Sports Hernia

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Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Mad Dog's Sirius channel expected to offer unique programming

Mad_dog_chris_russo_sirius_radio 8am-8:03am
Morning heist of the Sirius Radio Dog's coveted snausages.

8:04am-10am
Read the entire remaining schedule of the Kansas City Royals.  Unfortunately there will be no Francesa there to say, "That's a tough schedule there Dog, a tough schedule, maybe they play the spoiler in some spots, but that's tough, that's a tough one, that's a tough schedule there."  (Note: A different shitty team's schedule will be read each day). 

10:01am-11am
Point-by-point recap of his latest tennis match; preview of the 2010 Wimbledon.

11:01am-12pm
Point-by-point recap of early morning tennis match with ping pong table folded up against the wall.
"I surprised myself with a wicked forehand.  Unfortunately, it came right back in my face.  BAWAHAWAHAWAHAHA!!"

12:01pm-3pm
Reading and insightful commentary of Springstein setlists from every single show played during the 1984 "Born in the USA" tour.  Accompanying convincing clips to be played during riskier, weaker arguments.

3:01pm-4pm
Montage audio feast of Mad Dog saying "Willie" a million times, with the two LL's rolling off his tongue like the Road Runner speedily escaping Wile E. Coyote.  Dog will also fit in a spot or ten where he can trash Wilpon ownership for firing Willie.

4:01pm-4:15pm
Interview with SI's Jon Heyman and conclude the segment by telling him, "Nice job Jon.  That's a great job there by Jon Heyman.  Nice spot, great spot."

4:16pm-6:30pm
Intentionally say things that will piss off Phil Mushnick.

6:31pm-6:34pm
Dissection of a random parking attendants car maneuvering ability in a 'big spot'.

6:35pm-3am
Continuous loop of classic 'Dogisms - Disgrace!  Atrocious!  Terrible job there!  Gotta give me somethin' 'dere, show me somethin'!  Whaddaya have!  Let's take a look at the shheejool (schedule).  Get him outta the league!!!

3:01am-8am
For no apparent reason, just like everything else, John Minko aka Kermit recites every D-1 football schedule, game by game.

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