The Sports Hernia Blog

Just in case your eyes haven't yet been ruined by the Latino Dracula-Joker-Lizard

No, no, this is not a haunted wax figure, this is really Sammy Sosa.

Yankees take record 16 hours to become painfully insufferable World Champions

We're guessing that right now you're violently clenching a pair of pliers as part of a disturbing plot to rip out Girardi's braces.  In a fitting, annoying twist, you'll need to take a number.

Girardi likely to up ante with uniform switch [NY Post]

Bing looking to put dent in Google by completely pissing off the general public

We're guessing whatever minimal gains Bing may have made in the search market before today have since vanished faster than an innocent head in Rikishi's asscheeks.

[via, who else, Bing]

Girardi pays tribute to Hans and Franz in bizarre World Series trophy presentation

Then again, he could simply be wearing his official Yankees Championship tshirt over an astronaut suit.  Both are refreshingly edgy from a fashion standpoint.

And for the hell of it, here's Hans and Franz.

NY Post shocks oddsmakers, takes until Game 6 to photoshop Pedro's head on baby

Expect every member of the Yankees to be photoshopped on a horse's ass if they fail to close it out tonight.

Phillies inexplicably add Carlito Brigante to World Series roster

This is absolutely a strange, eery move for Philly, as the movie version of Brigante was viciously gunned down in the closing scene by Benny Blanco from the Bronx.

Mike Francesa and Phil Mushnick travel back in time for youthful, kinky pillow fight

To summarize, this is ten minutes of Mike Francesa showing off his shiny, untouchable tits. 

While he refutes Phil Mushnick's claims by expressing love for countless Jewish co-workers, big Mikey does fail to admit that he has always been anti-Eckstein, especially when the pesky little fella was a member of the Anaheim Angels.

But what his listeners would really like to know, since they haven't been told in a couple months, is if Andy Pettitte is in fact, a STAHTING PITCHA!

Francesa Responds to Mushnick Claim of Jew Bashing [Bob's Blitz]

Focused Canó to create balloon animals during tonight's National Anthem

Helpful, hopeful suggestion: Do not speak when Mike Francesa tries thinking

A segment dedicated entirely to Mike Francesa saying "weeeeeeeeee" while urinating would be more inspiring than what we have here.

[h/t: TheMikeFrancesa]

Mayor Bloomberg captures pulse of Yankee fans by sleeping in 9th inning

In a strange, unexpected twist, it appears 5-0 Phillies is exactly what a visibly pleased Bernie Williams had in mind.

[Click to enlarge.  Oh yes, Bloomie's had one to many Werther's Originals]