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Clemson's Dabo Sweeney is perplexed...

... and so aren't we at his slacks/belt choice. Are you even in the game Dabo? 

[via Yahoo Sports]

Exclusive: Hernia Reveals Possibilities of Rooney's Hair Transplant

Wayne Rooney admitted Saturday he had undergone a hair transplant, the results of which the British soccer player said he would reveal on Monday. 

However, the ever-crafty Hernia mole has learned that Rooney selected one of following three options:

70s Barry Manilow

Young Version of Rob Corddry from "Hot Tub Time Machine"

 

The always popular Hi-Top Fade 

 

 

Peter King

Peter King breaks down Eli Manning's progress:

(Week 3) "Quietly, Eli Manning is proving he can handle everything New York throws at him."

(Week 6) "If Eli Manning were a money-market fund, we'd all be rushing to buy. Instead, he's an NFL quarterback, and we're all rushing to get on the kid's bandwagon.

Manning's a fairly egoless quarterback who takes coaching very well for a man with his passing pedigree and lineage. And I applaud Manning for concentrating on what's important and tuning out all the fluff in the media and fan world."

(Week 8) "7. New York Giants (6-2). Don't kill Eli Manning for regressing and completing 8-of-22 passes for 59 yards in London. He was playing in a cranberry bog, from what I've heard about the Wembley pitch."

and finally....

(This Week) "a. This is not the negative New York media speaking. This is the impartial New Jersey media speaking. The more I see Eli Manning, the more I think he'll never be a championship quarterback.

b. I mean, taking a 26-yard sack in the fourth quarter? Ridiculous. And could he please get mad once? Punch the ground, kick the dog, cuss out his linemen, something. You know what the Minnesota game plan for playing Manning was in part? Hit him a couple of times on his first few dropbacks, and the book on him was he'd start throwing off his back foot. Which he did."

What is Houston Nutt?

Opinion Polls & Market Research

Media may think fondly of Brett Favre

According to a few of the Hernia's most reliable sources, there may be a love affair budding between the entire male sports media and Packers quarterback Brett Favre.  Now we know this is only preliminary, but some of these quotes we've been handed give us an inkling to what might become a much bigger story.  Stayed tuned...

"This guy here is a football player." --John Madden, NBC

"See that guy, that guy right there, that guy is a football player." --Paul McGuire, NFL network

"Brody Favre, now that's a bad man right there." --Emmit Smith, NFL Countdown

"Brett Favre, now there's a guy I can root for.  Have we ever seen one better?  Wow, just wow, Brett Favre." --Mike Lupica, NY Post

"Brad Favre is truly one of the greats, probably the best that's ever suited up for the Bears." --Pat Summerall, satellite radio

"Favre, I want to sprinkle your salt-and-pepper hair on my 9-egg omelet." --Tony Siragusa, Fox

"Favre has more fun out there than an 6-year-old hopped up on Jolt Cola in the ball pit at Chucky Cheese." --Bob Costas, HBO

"Brett Favre, he is a PTP'er, a Depends dandy, I love him, I just love him.  Up there in Wisconsin, the land of Bo Ryan and the Badgers. He's a gunslinger baby, with a capital G!  Brett if you are listening now, please do us all a favor, and play one more year, just one more year Brett." --Dick Vitale, ESPN

"Montana and Marino wouldn't have been able to do what they did if it wasn't for Brett Favre." --Jason Krause, 10-year old analyst for ESPN (Several other ESPN employees have also echoed these thoughts)